33 Lessons from 33 Years

Life’s too short to be stressed about work. Some stress helps you grow. Too much stress breaks you down. Know the difference.

When you find a job that pays well, feels fulfilling, and surrounds you with kind, inspiring people—you’ve hit the jackpot. Enjoy it.

Turn off slack and email notifications on your phone. You don’t need work pinging you 24/7.

Find a job that respects your life outside of work. I know the job market is tough right now, but coworkers who understand boundaries make all the difference in preventing burnout.

If you’re job hunting, don’t be afraid to cold-message people on LinkedIn. That’s how I got my job at Facebook in 2018. Most people won’t reply, but it only takes one yes.

When you get an offer, ask for more money. They need you as much as you need them. Ask for a higher salary, rate, or a signing bonus—the worst they can say is no.

Most people’s careers are nonlinear. Rarely do people stick with what they studied. I spoke about this in my TEDx talk.

Corporate life can be hard, but being your own boss is even harder. During my year-long creative sabbatical, I learned how tough it is to stay financially afloat and work alone for months at a time.

It’s okay to pivot—your career, hobbies, priorities, friendships. We’re always evolving. Embrace it.

Some friendships aren’t meant to last forever, and that’s okay. Some connections are tied to a job or a city. When that season passes, it’s okay to let the chapter close.

Lifelong friendship is like an unopened bottle of wine—the chemistry changes over time and the value grows. Treasure it.

Living near friends improves your quality of life. This year, Wes and I bought a house down the street from our best friends, and the small everyday moments—dog walks, Sunday breakfasts, random hangouts—bring so much joy.

Same goes for family. Now that we live close to my parents and sister, we get to show up for the little things: eating meals together, running errands, and pet sitting (my personal favorite 🐶).

Find a partner who’s a true teammate. In our thirteen years together, Wes and I have learned that a strong relationship means being on the same team, listening, respecting each other, and trusting each other’s intentions.

For the past three years, Wes and I have had monthly “life dinners”—a check-in where we reflect on the previous month, talk about wins, and discuss what we want to improve. We keep it low pressure and do it over a home-cooked meal at home (see the original “life dinner” concept from Brad Feld here).

Go on morning walks. I’ve been doing this since the pandemic and it’s my favorite way to start the day. Even on gloomy mornings, fresh air and trees make a big difference.

Make exercise a habit. Whether it’s walks or yoga, find ways to move consistently. Eventually it becomes part of who you are.

Spend more time near water. Surfing a few times a week this summer felt therapeutic and helped me appreciate life and nature. Even if you’re not a swimmer, take a walk by the pier or sit by a lake. Here’s a study that shares how time spent near water enhances our health.

Surfing is a funny sport. Jerry Seinfeld once said the ocean is like a nightclub, and the waves are the bouncers constantly throwing you out. Honestly, he’s right—but I’m still going back in lol.

Do physical activities that feel like play. It doesn’t need to be the gym. Anything that gets you moving counts.

Exercising with friends is a game changer. After meeting more surfers at my local break this summer, the sport became even more fun and I improved faster.

Prioritize sleep. In my twenties I used to be notorious for running on 4–5 hours of sleep a night. Now I get about 7 and it feels amazing. Sleep matters more than you think and if you need further convincing, here’s the book that did it for me.

Find a good therapist. I’ve worked with several, and each had different styles. This year I went back to therapy to work through anxiety and negative thought patterns, and I finally found someone I want to work with long-term.

If you’re not in a good headspace, it’s okay to pause your hobbies and creative projects. Guilt makes things worse. Be kind to yourself, take breaks, and do something else until your creativity comes back.

Cherish your hobbies. In a world full of creators and entrepreneurs, it’s easy to feel like everything needs to be monetized. But we all need hobbies that exist purely for joy.

Keep your old sketchbooks. I’ve rediscovered so many ideas that I wasn’t ready for years ago. Sometimes ideas just need time to simmer.

Speaking of simmering—don’t rush your creative process. Social media makes it feel like you need to post nonstop. But that pace isn’t sustainable. Outside the algorithm, it’s normal for great work to take years.

If you’re scared of becoming irrelevant by posting less, remember: good work takes time. As Colin and Samir said in a recent Q&A, “If they love your storytelling, they’ll give you the time of day”.

Take extended breaks from social media. It’s good for your mental health, and honestly, most people won’t even notice you were gone. (I disappeared from Instagram for six months this year and survived.)

Step away from your phone and explore long-form inspiration like books, magazines, and films. Slow creativity hits different.

Go on artist dates. Julia Cameron introduced the concept in The Artist’s Way. I like to take a few hours to explore a neighborhood, sketch at a café, people-watch at the beach, or wander through bookstores.

Take more photos. I treat my camera roll like a visual diary. Last year I even bought a film camera and started a physical photo album.

Be a storyteller. Not just a photographer or illustrator. Create images that spark curiosity and make people wonder.